James proposes that I marry a girl at our college for financial aid reasons.
Tim: Well, let her know that I'm willing to accept her offer, with a few conditions. Or, rather, YOUR offer.
James: Name 'em.
Tim: First, she must never look me in the eyes during the whole wedding ceremony. Not once. Second, she must introduce me to her parents as "The Monster That Took Down Godzilla". Third, I require a steaming hot bowl of ramen every afternoon when I get home from work, accompanied by a foot massage while I tell her about my day. Fourth, she must buy some Pokemon cards for both of us, and let me beat her whenever we battle. Fifth, whenever we go out for dinner, she must walk around the table barefoot four times for superstitious reasons. Sixth, while we're in college, I need piggyback rides to all of my classes... backwards.
James: She says this aint no Destiny's Child song
Tim: Oh. I was under the impression that this was a Destiny's Child song.
James: She drew the line at the last one.
Tim: Okay, then those six are fine. I'll just scrap the other eighteen.
