Dear Internet,
There’s this girl I know. Her name, for the sake of secrecy, is Emily Pancake. For some reason, I feel like our paths are going to cross later in life, and she will come up from behind me and hit me in the back of the head with a sack full of deadly, lethal potatoes.
Metaphorically, of course.
My problem is, I drew a picture of us holding hands (I was 19 when I drew this, which is obvious from the artistic skill with the shading and depth and perfect proportions of her big brainy head with no neck to her one foot that is bigger than the other). I sent this picture to her through what we used to call “mail” back in my day. There was no “e” in front of it, because if it were “e-mail” it would be “extremely fast”. This was regular mail.
My question, Internet, is this:
I think there’s some sort of rash growing underneath my left butt cheek. Could this be due to poor hygiene, or is it a bit more serious than that?
