Well, that was interesting. Excuse me, I’m going to go pour bleach on my eyes.
- Emily: "Quesadilla" literally translates to "cheese dilla".
- Tim: You are the cancer that is killing this world.
Driving with my dad to San Jose at 6:30 in the morning, then gonna have to drive from San Jose to Phoenix in one day.
Seriously, I’ve been a good boy all year. Why is this happening to me?
I got 99 problems so I use more gun.
Oh my goodness yes.
- Dad: So do you want a thigh, or a breast, or a drumstick, or...
- Tim: Oh, breast is fine. I love breasts.
- Dad: *poker face*
- Tim: *poker face*
- Dad: Um.
- Tim: Chicken.
- Dad: Yep.
- Tim: Yep.
20. “I’d do it again, and maybe a third time… But that’d be it.”
25. Oh my, it was amazing. What people say about seeing sparks, and fireworks, even with your eyes closed… It’s true. It’s all true. The magic that happens between two people and their lips, well… It’s sometimes indescribable. My last kiss was just indescribable.
I think coke was involved, or some other drug.
31. Saadia said that I looked nice in the clothes that I am planning on wearing to my job interview later today. I think. Maybe she told me how amazingly perfect my ass is. I don’t really notice anymore, she tells me so often.
1. What I want to be?
2. What I am wearing right now?
3. My last night out in detail?
4. First thing you thought about this morning?
5. One person from tumblr i’d throw off a cliff, one i’d marry and one i’d fuck?
6. Have you ever wished on a shooting star?
7. My longest relationship and who it was with?
8. What my last text message says?
9. What kind of person attracts you?
10. Is it hard to make you laugh?
11. Do you act differently around the person you like?
12. Does the last person you held hands with mean something to you?
13. What’s stopping you from going for the person you like?
14. Who would you like to see right now?
15. Are you missing someone?
16. What I find attractive in boys/girls?
17. Do you drink?
18. Is there anyone who doesn’t like you because of something you did?
19. The one person who’s arms I’d like to be in?
20. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
21. If i’ve done something I regretted very much?
22. What was the last party I went, and when will the next be?
23. The last time I felt jealous, and why?
24. Last person you hugged?
25. Your last kiss?
26. What you wear to bed?
27. Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is?
28. Picture of yourself?
29. Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?
30. The reason behind my last break up?
31. The last compliment that you’ve received?
32. My favourite actors/actresses?
33. Celebrity crush?
34. My favorite book?
35. A famous person I’ve been compared to?
36. The best thing that has happened to me this week?
37. Do you believe in abortion?
38. What my last text message says:
39. Something i’m currently worrying about.
40. Your own question that you want me to answer. Just write it.
Someone please do this so I have something to do during the 45 minute bus ride back to my school…
please please please
Particle Man, Particle Man
Doing the things a particle can
What’s he like? It’s not important
Is he a dot, or is he a speck?
When he’s underwater, does he get wet?
Or does the water get him instead?
I haven’t even gotten anything accomplished today.
That’s probably because a girl just took her pants off a few feet away from me why am I still on Tumblr.
She’s just looking at me.
Damn, I have nothing interesting to say. I don’t have any funny pictures to post. I don’t have anything to share with any of you. I have nothing interesting.
I have nothing interesting to say, or anything that anyone else would care about.
I am the 99% of Tumblr.
Oh, I got the Crunch Berries. I’m pretty sure that they’re my favorite. When I was in college (the one year that I went, lulz), they sold ‘em at the little store on campus, and I ate them by the box. Seriously, they got me through so much studying, and testing, and general swaggery, and I actually saved all of my boxes, just to see how much I’d been eating.
I think in one semester, I’d eaten somewhere around twelve boxes by myself. Or something around there. brb grabbing a bowl. :D
AAARRUGUGHG OUUUPPHPHGH ALL OF MY LOVE BLEEDING OUT OF MY HEART FOR YOU OH GOD IT FUCKING HURTS AAAUGHHG <3 <3 <3
- Nephew walks in, with grass in his hand.
- Nephew: Want some grass?
- Saadia: He's starting to sound more like his father every day.
And baby, don’t follow their lead
‘Cause you never know
Just how their story ends
Or how the story goes and
You are so confused
And, baby, it’s just like you
To say anything else
- Player: kitty's a bot
- (Kitty McThunderstorms is my TF2 name.)
- Kitty: What? No I'm not! I am not a robot in the slightest! I am a human! I have feelings, and emotions and stuff!
- Player: Prove it.
- Kitty: Okay, ask me anything.
- Player: what is 2 + 2
- Kitty: Fish. Next question.
- Player: what class am i right now?
- Kitty: I'm pretty sure that you are a pyro.
- Player: What color is my underwear?
- Kitty: They were originally white, but now they have a tinge of yellow.
- Player: okay, you're not a bot
I’m asleep but she’s talking to me.
She’s walking ‘round, wearing all of my clothes.
As she runs out of things to say
And grabs my coat to walk away,
“How about another first kiss?” She said.
“How about another first kiss?” I said.
“I want another first kiss like this.
How about another first kiss?”
I’m not posting this to brag.
I’m posting to ask: Is this a joke?